(I changed the chart...was computer issues - see previous message above ).
Sorry for the delay, but your question requires so much more than a simple answer, or a few lines, even tho' to you it may be simple for an astrologer to do. (Well, maybe some astrologers can, but, I find it hard to do that. Nonetheless, have done the best I can for a 'short' answer):
Basically it may be that you are always arguing with yourself, which inevitably makes it difficult for you to decide or to 'know' what it is you really want to do.
Part of the conflict is about finding a way between seeing all of the minute, individual parts of things, and then taking them to somewhere way out and far beyond. You want to see 'below' and then 'far above' almost simultaneously. This is a result of the 'Nodes' in your chart: S. Node (past) in Virgo (details), with your Sun (Centre of yourself) in conjunction with that point, opposite the North Node (future), in Pisces: the... 'who knows where this might lead?' point.
To add to this, your Midheaven (Vocation/Career point), is in Gemini...more of the 'details', and, the 'Degree Symbol' here is: "A glass-bottomed boat drifts over undersea wonders"...which is about seeing all that is possible. Here too in that area of your Vocation/Carerr, is Jupiter. Jupiter expands everything - all of the details, and suggests that not only do you have/will find within yourself, a way in which to express all of this, but also that this will come as a result of studying all of those details - for which you have a talent - and then using that knowledge to take it all to much further realms and areas.
What you perhaps need to do (and you have plenty of time) is to find someone or something to which you feel you can truly devote yourself. This is not an easy path, and you may sometimes choose wrongly, but that's a part of your way. You have SO many talents, and they are unique. The problem being that perhaps you will feel like you're a bit alone along the way at times - which is something you may have to deal with. But, what you 'go through', will enable you to decide on your course.
Be as patient and as kind to others as you can along your way as each person will add to your creativity. Some you come across will seem greedy and materialistic, so that you may lose your faith in 'humanity'. If that should be the case, don't let it stop you. You have so much to offer.
There's much going on right now that is assisting you. Perhaps you aren't seeing it? If not, take a second look.
Best,
Admin.
So, your talents are prodigious. And you're only just beginning!!!