long-term relationship potential?

Note that synastry requires two charts to be set up and analysed so, before asking, please make sure that this is a serious relationship. This is a free board and our time to respond is limited.
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Maura
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long-term relationship potential?

Post by Maura »

Hi,

Since last November I'm in a relationship with a girl I've know since highschool. We happened to meet again (she moved to the same town where I live) and since then we've been seeing each other.
I have strong feelings for her. She's funny and smart, she has a very dry sense of humor. Furthermore she has very strong morals, and she sticks to them, for which I admire her. I tend to be more adaptable to other people's opinions. Moreover, she has strong opinions about which she's very open. And of course I think she's pretty :mrgreen:

However, there are some themes in our relationship that differ a lot from what I experienenced during my previous relationships. For instance, she doens't talk about her feelings, nor does she ask me much about mine. It's not as if she HAS to tell me, because I can sense how she feels; I'm unsure if the same applies to her. Though I think our feelings are mutual. I myself don't talk about my feelings easily either. In general, communication between us is mostly non-verbal. That sort makes me feel quite close to her, but at times is makes me wonder where the two of us are heading to in this relationship. Does our synastry show any long-term relationship potential? These are our data:

Me: April 18, 1993
Time: 5:58 AM
Place: Haren, the Netherlands

She: November 6, 1992
Time: 3:40 PM
Placen, Groningen, Groningen, the Netherlands

thanks in advance! (by the way, I'm a man. Maura is the name of a female relative of mine. I can't chance my username anymore, so things may seem a bit confusing. Sorry!)
admin
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Re: long-term relationship potential?

Post by admin »

Hi Maura,

Thank you for giving those details - they're very helpful.

I'll respond as soon as possible, but please be a bit patient - if you can - as relationship matters are inevitably very involved, and take a fair amount of time to interpret.

Best,
Admin.
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
Maura
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon May 14, 2018 6:06 pm
Contact:

Re: long-term relationship potential?

Post by Maura »

Hello Admin,

Thank you for your reply, I'll just wait.
admin
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Re: long-term relationship potential?

Post by admin »

Hi Maura,

Thanks for your patience.

You are experiencing a major shift and transformation at this time, similar to what she had experienced between 2014-2016, so what you are going through now (and until the end of 2020), she can understand...at least to some extent because obviously it isn’t exactly the same.

There is one very strong aspect that you need to be aware of, and that is dreamy, idealistic Neptune in conjunction with your Moon currently. This sensitises you to the subtleties in the atmosphere, so that you can pick up on the feelings of others intuitively. This also makes it necessary for you to be aware that you’re not seeing things clearly at this time, and that you need to try to see the reality of the relationship, rather than looking at her through the proverbial ‘rose-coloured glasses’.

Another issue with regard to your relationship is that there might be a feeling of her blowing hot and cold, and perhaps there is a hold-up or delay of some kind that is hindering its progress. In fact both of you are feeling similarly about this, and this is due to Saturn, often dubbed ‘the harsh taskmaster’. But such feelings are due to a negative state of mind which can flare up at any apparent set-back or any feelings of coldness from or by either or both of you, not least of all because it is affecting both of you are your very roots. Perhaps it is that family problems are standing in the way or interfering in some way ? Try not to take it to heart as it’s just a period when you are both sorting out what you really need from a relationship, and this might not be the same as what you think you want or expect from each other.

If you are both prepared to work through the difficulties – and this could go on for a month or two – then it will make the relationship stronger and more able to endure any future hardships that may occur.

As I mentioned, you both have exactly the same degree on your 1st/7th House cusps, and on the 10th/4th too – a very rare occurrence indeed ! On the one hand, although this means that you will experience the same planetary energies in the same areas of your lives at the same time – which can help you to act in unison...on the other hand it can also mean that you experience similar difficulties at the same time. But never make the mistake of assuming that it IS identical for you both.

As you may imagine, when these transits are ‘positive’ this will buoy you both up at the same time. But, when they are difficult (as with Saturn mentioned above), because you are both in a similar negative state, you may at times assume that it’s the ‘other person’ who’s the cause.

There is a very beautiful connection between her Moon and your Venus/Mercury sitting on both your Ascendants. This is however, in opposition to both your Jupiter’s conjunct the 7th House cusp (the partner), and although this can be very supportive, it can result in both of you blowing things out of proportion. In fact, I suspect that this Saturn transit mentioned above is really testing this part of your relationship and hence, any doubts or frustrations either of you may have.

There may be issues about your goals and home/family matters which you could be finding hard to blend and/or agree about. With that Saturn hovering back and forth across the cusp of that area, this is one of the main issues that needs attending to.

It seems to me that the main difficulty might be in understanding that you are separate beings with separate identities as there may be a tendency to identify with each other too much, and then make assumptions about each other. The battle I suspect, is based in the need to recognise that you are actually different people and not project onto each other thoughts/ideas/feelings that the other person is not having. It’s like you may see the other person as a kind of mirror image in many ways and assume that they are thinking/feeling something when in fact, they’re not. Saturn is working here at this time to help you see the real individual rather than your projected image of them.

Transiting Uranus is helping here as this planet strives for individuality, and it is in both of your Ascendants (Self) and making a ‘smooth’ aspect to your 10th Houses (goals) and 4th Houses (roots/family). So, in fact this is – or should be – modifying that tendency to ‘muddle your identities’ and what was said previously.

You can both be quite fiery individuals and this too helps you to separate your identities, though at times there may be flare-ups and disagreements. This is likely because both of you can be very defensive, especially when feeling that you’ve been misunderstood and unfair assumptions have been made. She may find it harder to explain the depth to which any hurt goes as she is likely to take any hurt (whether real or imagined) very deeply with her Sun in Scorpio, even if she does flare up suddenly and seem to get over it quickly. Something will smoulder away deep down so that you may find that more comes out much later, and after you thought it was all cleared up.

There really is so much potential here, and if you can both weather this difficult time, it could well be a long-lasting relationship. Naturally, and as always in any relationship, it will depend on how aware you both can be, and how prepared you both are to work on the more difficult areas of your relationship. Mercury rules ‘communications’ and naturally one of the most important qualities of a relationship is being able to communicate with each other. And with your Mercuries in trine, this will help you to talk things through. Both of your Mercury’s are in fire Signs too, so there’s much intellectual enthusiasm – like a couple of kids getting excited together about ideas and adventures.

In the Composite chart, the all-important Moon (emotions/basic needs) is in trine to Mars giving a healthy capacity to work together, when needed, on the very foundations of the relationship. It might create an intuitive feeling between you, an understanding beyond words. Added to this the Moon and Mars form a ‘Grand Trine’ with Pluto in the 8th, so regardless of any surface or superficial difficulties, this will help to give the relationship great power at a level you aren’t even aware of. This may carry you through any difficulties, but I can’t know this for sure.

Whatever this relationship is, it isn’t ‘ordinary’ and will have a great importance in your lives and your individual development.

Hope this helps, and if you have any questions about it, please do ask and I’ll try to assist.

Best,
Admin.
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
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