Marriage and children?

Note that synastry requires two charts to be set up and analysed so, before asking, please make sure that this is a serious relationship. This is a free board and our time to respond is limited.
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Marriage and children?

Post by Desinkata » Mon Sep 28, 2020 12:38 am


We have been together for 3 years-20.06.2017.
We have an 8 year age difference. I'm just starting my career. This year I graduated from university and will start working. And he already has 10 years of experience. Do you think that our relationship will have any progrees in the areas of marriage and children? We have not talked about this topic yet.
I would like to know if we will get married and if we will have children? We live together form dec. 2017.
I left the data visible - Sinastry Chart.
I am born at 4.May.1997 - at 4.00 a.m. - Bulgaria, Yambol - I am living in Capital Sofia from 2016/09
He is born at 17.Sept.1987 - at 3:15 p.m. - Bulgaria, Sofia.

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Re: Marriage and children?

Post by admin » Thu Oct 08, 2020 11:02 am

Hi Desinkata,

I apologise for the delay in responding.  Thank you for your patience.

First thing that strikes me is that during the period you have been together, transiting Neptune has been more or less sitting on your Asc. and in opposition to both your and his Mars (which are in exactly the same degree of Virgo).   I'm intrigued by this, and by the fact that you've both weathered this rather confusing and even 'weakening' influence as it suggests (taking it on its own) that at the very least it would have been difficult for you both to make decisions together.   

Clearly you have both overcome this so far, and indeed you have some very powerful influences drawing you together, such as his Sun/Venus in your 7th, conjunct your North Node and Vertex there which gives a sense that the relationship is "meant to be".   Nonetheless, with transiting Neptune conjunct your Ascendant I'd suggest that you may not be seeing things clearly and may be prone to over-idealise him, as well as your view of life in general.  Add that he has Neptune natally conjunct his Asc. and in effect you are 'mirroring' each other's fantasies and ideals, at least at this time and for a few years to come.  This can actually be a very beautiful position, and with your Mercury, Sun and Venus in earthy practical Taurus, and Mars in earthy Virgo, along with his earthy Sun/Mars in Virgo, you are likely to be able to "keep your feet on the ground" - at least when it's really needed.

With regard to marriage and children, with both your natal Mars's in square to his Saturn, this can suggest that he may tend to hold back the progress of the relationship...albeit to 'make sure' of its stability, or perhaps of your constancy.  I suspect that the matter of the age difference may have a stronger hand in this than he may realise or admit.   Are you aware of any such hint of this ?  Or is he open about it ?

Looking at the Composite chart, with Pluto there conjunct the Midheaven/10th House cusp, this relationship with affect and change your lives considerably.  In one way or another, as a couple you will have a great influence over others in some way, to the point that somehow it will change their lives.  This would be relevant if you were working together on some joint project in which you both believe very strongly.  On the other hand, the relationship will change both your lives in a major way, perhaps even changing your individual goals in life, or at least your attitudes towards 'the world'.   As long as you are united and work together towards some specific goal, you will be virtually unstoppable.   

This is borne out by the Composite Aquarius Rising with Saturn Rising conjunct the Ascendant, and which again, suggests that you need a 'goal' outside of the relationship to work for together.  Alternatively this can mean that you will need to give each other the freedom to pursue your own courses in your own ways.

The Moon in the 4th House in Taurus suggests a good solid family base.  However, the Moon's wide opposition to Pluto can suggest that career matters may challenge  'domestic bliss' , though other aspects (a 'Grand Trine' involving Pluto, Jupiter, and Sun/Mercury/Venus)  help very strongly for you to be able to resolve this issue.

I do think that marriage and children are possible with him.   However, his chart suggests that he has some fears about commitment...has be been badly hurt in previous relationships ?  With Chiron conjunct his 7th House cusp, I'd suggest that he is afraid of being hurt and, as a result, may have 'played the field'  then finding that perhaps few, if any, matched up to his vision of an 'ideal' partner.  

There are some very strong and helpful aspects around with regard to the possibility of marriage during these next few years, but you may have to weather a few storms during the next few months and into next year.  However, this might well depend upon any demands  you may make with regard to marriage...that is if you intend to do such...or it may be that your career takes off and you become more independent.  (Perhaps he's also aware of this and that it may lead you to meeting another 'someone' or that you may become more 'career-orientated' , either or both of which may result in any hesitation on his part with regard to marriage).

If you do marry, then the Composite chart suggests there will be children.

Overall I'd suggest that you may be thinking about marriage at this time because perhaps - at least in part - you 're wanting  'something'/someone you feel you can rely on, given that you're 'just starting your career'...which is an unknown and about which you may naturally be feeling at least a bit fearful.   (Quite possibly he's aware of this too, whether consciously or unconsciously).  

So, don't rush ahead of yourself.   You have tremendous potential in your career and you might find that once you're established in that area, marriage and children might seem less attractive to least for a while.

I hope this helps.

"Letting there be room for not knowing is the most important thing of all. When there’s a big disappointment, we don’t know if that’s the end of the story. It may just be the beginning of a great adventure". Pema.

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Re: Marriage and children?

Post by Desinkata » Wed Oct 14, 2020 4:52 am

Thank you so much for the answer. I was really hoping to get it.
At the beginning of our meeting, everything happened very quickly. I didn't have much time to think and realize that we were going to have a serious relationship. Over the years, however, this has happened. Of course, I get a lot of support and finances from him, because I am unemployed.
We have not discussed the topic of marriage and children, as it is difficult to share. In general, it is difficult for us to say some things. We both have our first serious relationship. Maybe it's because we both have retrograde Mercury in our natal chart?
My worries come from the fact that my parents divorced in 2015 and my mother has another child from another man. My mother and father also have retrograde Mercury in their natal charts.
Also, my first and seventh house rulers are squared, and the seventh house ruler is retrograde.
The other thing that impresses me is that Jupiter, which is responsible for the marriage on my natal chart, is in the 12th house, which is square to my Sun.
Mars, which is on the cusp of the seventh house, also worries me a lot, as does Chiron.
And my boyfriend also has bad aspects between the rulers of the first and seventh houses, Jupiter in the seventh house and chiron.
As far as I know he had a previous relationship with a committed woman for 2 years, of which he was a lover.
And before that, he ended his relationship with a woman because she wanted a serious relationship.
In general, age is not a problem, he falls on younger women.
He is very jealous, but he wants freedom, which is not very fair.
I have hopes for a career and I want to develop, to be independent. I have an example from the men in my family that I can't count on them.
Can you tell me what you mean that "weather a few storms during the next few months and into next year."?
Thank you

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