Love marriage

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Abhishek009
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Love marriage

Post by Abhishek009 » Sun Aug 27, 2017 4:13 am

I am madly in love with a girl.

My Details –

DOB-02-10-1986
Time- 1:04 pm
Place- Jamshedpur, Jharkhand, India

My GF’s details –

DOB : 18-09-1990
Time : 2:10 pm
Place : Chinsurah, Hooghly, West Bengal, India

We are colleagues who met 9 months ago, and we are in a committed relationship for the past 7-8 months. We both love each other a lot and want to get married in 2 more years.

Now the problem is her family(mother) is opposing the marriage and wants her to get married to her childhood friend. She is not willing to do the same and wants to get married to me. She has lost her dad 5 years ago and she is the only breadwinner of the family of 3, I love her a lot and I always support her emotionally and want to give her joy and happiness, however her mom is not willing to accept me and she is also in a doubt about me.

We are in a hell of situation , I just want to now, how do you see the situation. Can we both get married to our dream person ?

If we do not get married to our dream person how will be life, please help us.........

PS : I request you to kindly provide a detailed time period for things to get sorted so that we can be fine with life again.

admin
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Re: Love marriage

Post by admin » Mon Aug 28, 2017 12:19 pm

Hello Abhishek,

This does feel like a ‘destined’ relationship, though there is indeed a lot of idealisation of each other, which is something you both need to be very aware of in order not to get disappointed when you discover that you are actually both human beings and therefore both having human flaws. However, I do feel that you are both able to deal well with the reality of each other as long as your expectations aren’t way too high.

I also feel that you will be together ultimately, but you will need to traverse some very stormy seas and remain true to your goal in order to achieve your hopes. Both of you have some very good aspects coming up, but it will take time and determination to get through the difficulties, of which, as you know, there are many. And as your better aspects arrive before hers do, you will have to be the one to keep her spirits and hopes buoyed up to get through this journey as certainly she will find it very hard to go against her parents’ wishes and not give in to them.

Transiting Pluto - in the 12th House of the Composite chart - will be trine the Composite Moon at end of this year which may well strengthen your love for each other, but may also indicate a lot of ‘behind-the-scenes’ activity going on. This could be her parents making plans that you don’t know about. OR, it could mean that you and she will be making your own secret plans.

I think that there will be a ‘make or break’ influence by March/April next year, or if that doesn’t completely end the struggle, it may go on until 2019...which is when you have said you plan to marry. It’s important that if you do make such plans, you ensure that they are viable and that you have planned properly and fully. (Somewhere to live; work matters; and not least of all preparing for the anger and possible censure and stigmatisation that may come from her parents and family should they not give in). May I ask what your parents think about this relationship ? Are they supportive ?

I really do see that you have such a beautiful merging of Souls, but of course more than this is needed to sustain a relationship in this world...and this you also have together. So, put on your hard-hat, gear yourself up for this journey, and plan properly and fully.

I’ll be very surprised if you don’t eventually marry each other as, despite all of the struggles indicated, I think that there is so much strength and beauty in this relationship, it will have to win out.

I wish you all the very best.
Admin.
He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
Chinese proverb

Abhishek009
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Jul 29, 2017 4:25 pm
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Re: Love marriage

Post by Abhishek009 » Sun Sep 24, 2017 3:33 am

Dear Admin,

At the first instance I express my sincere apologies for a delayed reply, next I would like to sincerely thank you for your detailed explanations..

I would like to state as under -
there is indeed a lot of idealisation of each other,
Absolutely true, though we have a lot of cultural , mental and other similarities , yet we do have a lot of differences in this regard, I like to solve problems by communicating and she keeps to herself which often increases confusion and strains the relationship.
And as your better aspects arrive before hers do, you will have to be the one to keep her spirits and hopes buoyed up to get through this journey as certainly she will find it very hard to go against her parents’ wishes and not give in to them.
Sir, I keep doing the same and don't force her, I try to help her take an unbiased opinion and support her to the maximum I can and hopefully if such situation arises I can definitely support her.
it may go on until 2019...which is when you have said you plan to marry.
We may extend the date of marriage to 2020 / to a comfortable time when things settle down, we are not in a hurry about that.
(Somewhere to live; work matters; and not least of all preparing for the anger and possible censure and stigmatisation that may come from her parents and family should they not give in). May I ask what your parents think about this relationship ? Are they supportive ?
I am well prepared for marriage, my family is extremely supportive and I do have a good job to support 2-3 more people without feeling a pinch, further my family will be more than happy if I select someone for marriage myself rather than they having to choose someone for me.

Now the problem is since 10th September she has reduced, rather completely cut all communication with me. We have hardly communicated for more than 5 min and that too on her birthday and due to my illness. No SMS/Calls and Watsapp. I don't know what she is up to, whether she will ever communicate/return and this is killing me badly. Can you please predict by when ca situation normalise for us and the probable reason for such abnormal behaviour ?

admin
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Re: Love marriage

Post by admin » Sun Oct 01, 2017 9:49 am

Dear Abhishek,

In answer to this post and to your 'pm':

I feel that this is very much due to at least transiting Pluto which has just turned direct and heading to her Saturn. This is a powerful internal fight deep within her which she doesn’t understand and which would make it hard for her to communicate to anyone, what’s going on inside of her. So I don’t feel that it’s necessarily ‘ego’ clashes as much as it is simply that she’s having trouble with this internal battle. If she is being egoistic, that’s just a front to cover up her confusion. And with your Mars Rising - which can be impatient because it needs action - and conjunct her Ascendant, if you push her, she’ll simply retreat because she doesn’t know what else to do, how to deal with it nor how to respond, as she can’t put it into words. Furthermore, trying to get a response from her will make her angry and frustrated too because she doesn’t know how to articulate her feelings and what she’s going through.

If you can, I think it’s best to leave her alone for the time being, in order to let her try to sort herself out.

For you currently, this transiting Jupiter conjunct your Mercury (which needs to be able to communicate and understand what’s going on), opposite transiting Uranus in your 3rd (communication too), is making you nervy and edgy and needing things to resolve quickly, so this lack of communication is very frustrating for you, to say the least. But again, it’s not the right time to push her.

I’m sorry but I can’t say exactly when this will ease, although I suspect that something will shift, even in these next few days. If it doesn’t, then all I can suggest is that you be as patient as you possibly can – a tall order I know, but if you keep insisting or getting into fights with her, you’ll cause her to retreat further. You just have to wait quietly and see how it unfolds, and if you do this, perhaps she will come to you of her own accord.

But to repeat again...give her some space and be patient with her !

Do keep me updated (if you wish to do so), but again, give her some time to understand what’s going on.

Best,
Admin.
He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
Chinese proverb

Abhishek009
Posts: 3
Joined: Sat Jul 29, 2017 4:25 pm
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Re: Love marriage

Post by Abhishek009 » Sun Oct 01, 2017 8:20 pm

admin wrote:This is a powerful internal fight deep within her which she doesn’t understand and which would make it hard for her to communicate to anyone, what’s going on inside of her. So I don’t feel that it’s necessarily ‘ego’ clashes as much as it is simply that she’s having trouble with this internal battle. If she is being egoistic, that’s just a front to cover up her confusion.
Yes , sir she told me about the same a number of times that she is having some of her own issues - Tough apparently it appears to me as her extreme EGO where she wants me to break the ice every time.
And with your Mars Rising - which can be impatient because it needs action - and conjunct her Ascendant, if you push her, she’ll simply retreat because she doesn’t know what else to do, how to deal with it nor how to respond, as she can’t put it into words. Furthermore, trying to get a response from her will make her angry and frustrated too because she doesn’t know how to articulate her feelings and what she’s going through.
Absolutely true sir, I am getting impatient - It feels like she is making fun of my emotions and is creating unnecessary drama. Sir, I am not pushing her, I keep replying and responding as and when she initiates , though nowdays its once in a week/so. I have given her enough space and time for her to think and decide, though its very very frustrating for me , as I feeling like being cheated / fooled and dragged into her nonsense emotions for no reasons.
If you can, I think it’s best to leave her alone for the time being, in order to let her try to sort herself out.
I have left her alone though she complaints whenever we talk that I am not supportive, whenever she needs me , I am not there etc.... ( Seems sort of manipulative technique to me) and for days neither she/nor me have any interaction ( Seems hardly we have any relation LOL :x )
For you currently, this transiting Jupiter conjunct your Mercury (which needs to be able to communicate and understand what’s going on), opposite transiting Uranus in your 3rd (communication too), is making you nervy and edgy and needing things to resolve quickly, so this lack of communication is very frustrating for you, to say the least. But again, it’s not the right time to push her.


Absolutely true sir, the situation is extremely nervy and frustrating for me, seems like she is deliberately doing these nonsense to disturb my peace of mind.
I’m sorry but I can’t say exactly when this will ease, although I suspect that something will shift, even in these next few days. If it doesn’t, then all I can suggest is that you be as patient as you possibly can – a tall order I know, but if you keep insisting or getting into fights with her, you’ll cause her to retreat further. You just have to wait quietly and see how it unfolds, and if you do this, perhaps she will come to you of her own accord.
Ok sir, I will continue what I am doing , will not push her, but will respond as and when she initiates any discussion.
But to repeat again...give her some space and be patient with her !
Certainly sir, I am doing the same for months now !!!! :D :D :D :D
Do keep me updated (if you wish to do so), but again, give her some time to understand what’s going on.
Sir, your predictions are always 99.99% true, so I love to seek your predictions , please dont' feel disturbed if I keep pinging you...

Thank you sir, for your excellent near perfect predictions and timely guidance and advice every time, please keep up the good work... :D

Regards
Abhishek

admin
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Re: Love marriage

Post by admin » Wed Oct 11, 2017 11:50 am

Dear Abhishek,

I’m suspecting that her ‘egoistic’ response is less ‘ego’ than it is because you are pushing her too hard so that she reacts by simply trying to stand her ground. Your Mars Rising and conjunct her Ascendant is the main problem here as you are expecting her to act as quickly as you do, which she simply can’t do and which will simply increase her resistance. And this will be her reaction and response for at least a few more weeks.

Added to this she is feeling particularly sensitive at the moment (and will be so for some time to come) so you do need to try to be aware of this in your treatment of her, especially currently. Furthermore she is also feeling quite unsure of herself so if you try to bully her into anything, all you’ll do is build resentment in her. I don’t think she’s being manipulative, though that is clearly how it feels to you. I think that rather she’s trying to find ways to go through some very very difficult internal changes that she’s unable to fathom and so is being ‘obstinate’ to protect herself.

Really Abhishek, you are going to need to develop tremendous patience, which I know is very hard for you to do especially as she can’t articulate all of what’s going on within her so it’s really frustrating for you. And I’m afraid that a few days or weeks of being patient is not going to be enough. Perhaps family pressures are also making it much harder for her to respond in the way you wish her to do. Have you talked with her more about this ? Perhaps you will be able to understand what’s going on re her resistance to you if you can gently encourage her to discuss those issues and problems more.

What is it exactly that you are asking of her that is creating this wall of resistance ? If it’s a straight ‘Yes/No’ re marriage then you’ll push her away because she’s fighting other battles and will just respond in the way that she is currently doing because she doesn’t know how else to deal with all that’s going on around and within her.

Best,
Admin.
He who asks is a fool for five minutes, but he who does not ask remains a fool forever.
Chinese proverb

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