Is Mars Retrograde Messing Me Up?

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Confused
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Is Mars Retrograde Messing Me Up?

Post by Confused »

I'm a scorpio and my ex is a leo. My ex has always chased me until recently. We've been together for over 5 years and I am her first love andw we're highschool sweet hearts. Recently she broke up with me because I was being a jerk. I corrected the issue and we got back together. Out of nowhere she broke up with me mid february. She still loves me and her actions in dealing with me always tell me that she is happy to be around me. I feel she is doing this because she thinks it's what best for her in the long term as she feels we wouldn't have a successful future. She has wanted to marry me since day one and has been more into me then I have her in the past. She used to be obsessed with. Now she purposely ignores me because she doesn't want to deal with me trying to fix things. I spent a week not talking to her and then texted her and she spent the whole day arguing with me about the things i did wrong while all the while I kept saying, I'm not trying to talk about us just seeing how your doing, your my best friend. In her rant she said there were still things I did she doens't agree with. I feel as if I'm more so being punished\trained to not do certain things rather then being pushed out of her life. She says things that just dont allign with someone trying to break up. She says she doesn't want to marry a flirt (she's very insecure). I don't feel she owes me any defense. I found it interesting to note that a few weeks after the mars retrograde she broke up with me and would find it even more interesting if she starts retreating on her actions come mid april. Can anyone tell me how to deal with this issue. I feel as if we are more on a break then a break up and know if I were to find someone else that would be the fatal blow to our relationship.

Is this a strong influence of mars for me to reflect and better myself? I want to respect her feelings by walking away because that's what she makes it seem like. That there is no chance. She has been like that in the last break up too. I've asked her to tell me that straight forward as I deserve the respect of closure and she doesn't reply. Has mars gripped her anger for the time being?

xtra info: I've broken up with her multiple times in the past and she has begged for me back before. she has told me I was the one and there was no one else for her. Seems the roles have changed and has me confused out of my mind. Any help would be much appreciated.

Her: moon in aries, venus in cancer, 7th house in libra. Her mars is in taurus
My: moon in leo, venus in sagittarius, 7th house in aquarius. My mars is libra
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Re: Is Mars Retrograde Messing Me Up?

Post by admin »

Hi confused,

Welcome and thankyou for posting.

It isn't possible to answer your queries with such limited information. Please supply birth data for both of you (Date of Birth, Time and Place of Birth, so that your birthcharts can be set up and compared). If you prefer not to post this data on the open forum, you can 'pm' me. I will keep such details private if you wish, however my response to your query will of course be posted here.

Best,
Admin.
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
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Re: Is Mars Retrograde Messing Me Up?

Post by admin »

Hi Confused,


I think the primary issue for her currently, is related to T. Uranus which is about to enter her 1st House/Asc. (She would have been ‘feeling’ this energy since Uranus entered Aries in March 2011).
This, as you are probably aware, can create a strong need for independence – especially in Aries - as well as creating erratic behaviour while seeking this independence.

Meanwhile, T. Saturn, now Retrograde in the 28th deg of Libra in her 7th (Relationships), is sq. her Jupiter and Venus in Cancer, so I don’t feel that she is going to trust anyone much with regard to relationships – at least for a while.

T. R. Mars in her 6th is quincunx her Asc, so I think she’s trying to figure things out but not feeling particularly able to do so.

Meanwhile, Pluto (which has been going through your 5th House since 2006 – hence the powerful attraction) has been crossing back and forth, your Neptune therein. (Neptune ‘rules’ your 8th, and the way in which you ‘merge’ with others at a very deep level). Pluto/Neptune ‘forces’ a very deep inner transformation. It rules your 4th (and your Sun, Pluto, Mercury in Scorpio), in these areas and matters related to all of this. For you, difficult tho’ it may be/have been at times, it is about discovering/redefining so many facets of your being, to the point that after it is over, you will no doubt, not even recognise who you were prior to this. (This will continue until late this year, so your choices now may well not feel relevant after that time).

Added to this, R. Mars in your chart has moved back into your 1st House (it turned R. conj. the cusp of your 2nd House which has to do with the way in which you value yourself). You had a taste of this in Jan/Feb. this year. When it comes back to this point in June, you will start to really begin to understand what this means and will take action more quickly and directly.

Meanwhile, between your charts, the primary issue is your Sun’s in sq.: Remember that this is ‘Fire and Water’, both fighting to be dominant. As Pluto is ‘ruler’ of your Sun and is also (widely) sq. her Sun, she is going to fight against anything you push onto her. (This is also part of the ‘obsession’). Your Mars (co-ruler of your Sun) helps here, as it is in sextile to her Sun. Also your Jupiter is in trine with her Sun, which enables you to ‘forgive’ each other. However, note that your Sun is opp. her Mars, which aggravates any ‘ego’ issues and suggests some fiery confrontations; along with your Mars in sq. to her Venus, which can result in being a bit out of synch at times.

Your Saturn’s are both in aspect to each of your Sun’s, which suggests a long term relationship, which, even if it does not continue as a love relationship, it will endure for a very long time in one form or another.

There is so much more which obviously, I can’t cover here. I do feel that, even tho’ you are in a difficult place with regard to this relationship at this time, you are going to have to step away. If she keeps coming back to you, be a friend but don’t push any further (and also don’t allow yourself to be pulled back into it, much as you might like to do so. If you do, you may well expect the roller-coaster to continue, unless you take a stand – which of course, you are no doubt a bit reluctant to do).

Re: “If I were to find someone else that would be the fatal blow to our relationship.”
I don’t see that you are in the right state of mind to get into another relationship at this time...do you? If you attempt to do so while this is still going on, any other person you become involved with may well get hurt, which will then make you feel guilty about both of them.

I’m sorry if this is not what you want to hear, but I do hope it sheds some little bit of light on the matter.

Best,
Admin.
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
Confused
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Re: Is Mars Retrograde Messing Me Up?

Post by Confused »

Thanks for the detailed response. A lot of that I really just don't know about. Astrology terms are foreign to me. Your explanations make sense and in a way I suppose I knew that's mostly that's what I have to do for me.  A few things left me curious of you could elaborate a little.

You said "you don't feel she is going to trust anyone much with regard to relationships – at least for a while."

Does that mean with me or another guy or both?

You spoke about changing facets of my life. Does that mean I am going to have a distant oak energy to want to change my way of living via maturity?

you said " ‘Fire and Water’, both fighting to be dominant. As Pluto is ‘ruler’ of your Sun and is also (widely) sq. her Sun, she is going to fight against anything you push onto her. (This is also part of the ‘obsession’"

The obsession. Is that hers or mine? And how does my help there?

You said we're suppose to have a long relationship romantically or not. 

As in we're not going to just become people who don't talk to each if we don't get back together?

You said I should take a stand? Take a stand against what?

You also said there was a lot more. I'm very curious what else there is you would.

Thanks for the response very interesting
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Re: Is Mars Retrograde Messing Me Up?

Post by admin »

Hi Confused,

I'll go into these issues more, later.

Please do be patient if you can.

Thank you.

Admin.
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
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Re: Is Mars Retrograde Messing Me Up?

Post by admin »

Hi again confused,
Her need for independence is likely to continue for some years hence. However, this does not mean that she won’t want a relationship, rather that she is likely to need any relationship to be on a different footing, as in – she’ll need her partners not only to allow her the freedom in the areas in which she needs to express this, but also to support her need for such in those areas – she’s also changing her image of herself with regard to who and what she wants to be and do ‘out there in the World’.

Going back to one of your earlier queries: “You said "you don't feel she is going to trust anyone much with regard to relationships – at least for a while." This is about her attempting to understand the way in which she experiences relationships. There is some problem or issue surrounding this, perhaps not least of all that she is realising how much she was felt confined to do/be what is/was ‘expected’, which she is now realising doesn’t have to be so. She needs ‘breathing space’ so she can figure this out for herself, and it’s really important that you give her this time and space.

Re ‘the obsession’: well, that’s primarily your obsession with her; her ‘obsession’ is, I feel, her ‘independence’.

Re: “You said we're suppose to have a long relationship romantically or not.
As in we're not going to just become people who don't talk to each if we don't get back together?”
Nope, this means that there is a strong link that may last for a very long time. It doesn’t mean you will ‘marry’, nor does it mean that if you’re not ‘together’ it won’t last into the future as a friendship. It means that there is ‘a connection’ that will...last, in one way or another, probably for years to come. (I understand in your present state of mind about this relationship, how this could easily be taken the ‘wrong’ way, and especially given that you’re under much pressure at this time and that you’re desperate about this issue). You won’t thank me for this, but you’re focussing excessively on this matter right now, which is surely understandable. But, as you have found and said, it has already started you on a major self-transformation. You’ve done most of the work...just a little bit more to go which this next month will start to reveal to you.

(I can’t say if one day you’ll get married to her, but I do feel that this is something she is not in the mode to consider, and you have asked in the Vedic area as suggested).

Best.
Admin.
"Don't let the illusions of your past or future rob you of the infiniteness of your present." [Unknown]
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